Danny and I headed to Coney Island around 11am. It takes about an hour to get there. We had 7,000 stops on the train from 14th Street. There were four people on our car. NO ONE was taking the train to Coney Island. We did zero research about it, had no plan, and barely knew how to get there We just knew we had to go!
After an hour on the train, we got close to Coney Island and started to see the Ferris Wheel. We jumped up and down on the train like little kids. We continued to act like children all day. Children who are old enough to drink tequila.
It looks exactly like you would expect it to look. Like you stepped back in time. Rides that should have been shut down decades ago with a spectacular boardwalk along a particularly ugly beach. It was a gorgeous day. Sunny but cool outside. We figured we should get the “lay of the land first” and wandered around for a bit. Our excitement got the better of us and we bought the $100 ticket so we could get the extra $40. Side note – Danny and I are both chicken shits and scared of roller coasters. How were we going to spend $140 without riding any rides? Danny asked after we bought our card, “does this cover rides, games, AND beer?” It did. Success!
We decided to start with the simple Ferris Wheel. It was not covered on our card. It was part of a separate park. Should have done our research. We bought our tickets.
Do you want the swinging or non-swinging cars?
Swinging, of course!
Our car showed up and we jumped in. The carney closed the door and I asked if he double checked to make sure we were locked. He replied, “Ma’am…this is Coney Island. Not Disney. You’re lucky we checked at all.”
Feeing safe. It’s a Ferris Wheel. Kids ride it. That became our mantra for the day.
It was a combination of a Ferris Wheel/roller coaster. We were not expecting the roller coaster part but we survived.
Feeling confident, we ran over to the Cyclone. It was built in 1927 and is a wooden roller coaster. Yes…WOODEN! People have been trying to shut it down since the 1970’s due to it being a piece of crap. Until some people invested millions of dollars to repair it…sort of and it is now on the National Register of Historic Places. Without thinking about it, we hopped on. Clicky clack is what it sounded like for the entire ride. WOODEN ROLLER COASTER. You are held in by a flimsy metal bar…no seat belts or headrests. We caught air at one point. Soaring through the air at 70 miles per hour. Charles Lindbergh said it was better than flying. No one has died on it since 2007. We survived. Barely.
I was sort of hyperventilating but trying to be a badass. We decided to slow down a bit and rode some sort of cup ride that looked like a more advanced version of the teacup ride at Disney. Safe. It was not. It was also a roller coaster. When we got off the ride, the people behind us shouted at us “we thought this was a kid’s ride!!!” Same.
Then we went on the swings. The swings that are way up high in the air and spin around so you are swinging at a 45-degree angle. Another flimsy bar to “hold us in”. No seat belts. Feet dangling in the air. I got through it with deep breathing exercises. In between repeating to Danny that I was ready for it to be over.
It was time for drinks. We went to a really old dive bar on the Boardwalk and ordered Palomas…in a can. The bartender opened up cans of grapefruit San Pellegrino and poured out a third of it, filled the rest up with tequila, salted a lime, and popped it into the top of it. Brilliant. But, not strong enough for us. We drank a little and then doubled up on the tequila.
Full of liquid courage, we decided to ride another roller coaster. I think it was called Steeplechase because you sit on a horse and lean forward like you are a jockey. I freaked out while we were in line. I told Danny I couldn’t do it. The woman buckling in the riders said it was her favorite ride and so much easier than the Cyclone. She said the Cyclone is terrible but this was fun. Fine. She was right and we were actually finally sort of properly strapped in to this ride.
More drinks to celebrate our bravery…overcoming fears…for both of us! We stuck with the tequila and went to an even more divey bar than the last one. The tequila we drank was so cheap, it wasn’t even kept behind the bar. Or on the bar. It was somewhere under the bar. When I told the bartender it was gross, he gave us free shots of Patron. The bar was closing up around us so we went out on to the Boardwalk for a little impromptu dancing with strangers. And then a little more dancing. And then hot dogs. Nathan’s Hot Dogs. And cheese fries. When in Rome…
Quick break to ride the go-carts.
Then we played some ridiculous games and I won a lewd eggplant and Danny won an oversized pickle dressed as a man.
We were finally ready for the Superman ride. I can’t remember what it was called…maybe Soaring Eagle. You are completely strapped in with your arms in front of you like Superman. The ride turns horizontal and you are the roller coaster. So, you fly around directly above the tracks…until the ride turns upside down and you are directly beneath the tracks. I asked the woman checking us in what she thought about it and she said she was too scared to do it. We were afraid of it ALL DAY and had to work up our nerve to do it. It was the best ride of the day. We loved it!
The park was shutting down and it was time for us to leave. As we headed to the subway, we saw the Superman woman…she RODE THE RIDE! She had been too scared to ride it until we did it.
Coney Island is cheesy and ridiculous. It is slightly unsafe. It is a day I will not forget for a long time!